Many people see divorce mediation as a cheap and fast option to resolve their marriage up to their needs and preferences. Yet, it doesn’t always work out the way you expect it to. Moreover, mediation cannot solve each and every marriage termination case. Discover what mediation is and its peculiarities, and what is even more important – when is divorce mediation not recommended. This will allow you to avoid common mistakes and help you choose a fitting strategy to cope with the end of your marriage successfully.
Learning about the ins and outs of mediation and, most importantly, when it may not be the right choice for your divorce can help you select a suitable approach for a successful divorce. For instance, highly skilled mediators at BlissDivorce in San Francisco can provide expert guidance through this process.
What Is Divorce Mediation
Divorce mediation is a process handled by a third-party specialist to help you reach a mutually beneficial agreement in a marriage termination case. You can both start with divorce online in Texas or hand in your papers personally and then choose mediation if you cannot arrive at a compromise on your own.
The mediator is trained to help you lead a peaceful discussion, reflect on your issues, and come to an agreement that will leave every family member satisfied. Mediators won’t give you any specific advice on what to go after here and there but will only guide you through the stages of discussion and agreement. You may need to cooperate with a family law attorney, too, to decide what is best for your case and avoid common mistakes.
Mediation is cherished for having a much lower price than litigation and allowing you to round up your case quickly. Plus, it enables you to have full control over divorce decisions and deliver situation-specific solutions for your case.
When to Avoid Divorce Mediation
Yet, mediation is not a super powerful tool that can help you lead your divorce to success unless you qualify for it. In many situations, mediation may even make things worse or just have you to waste your time and money without any results. Review when is divorce mediation not recommended not to choose it for divorce resolution in the wrong situations.
1. Domestic Violence
Domestic violence or abuse is among the top contraindications of mediation. You can hardly rely on a spouse who you don’t feel safe around and you cannot guarantee they will cooperate efficiently. If you choose mediation as your main way to deal with divorce in a similar situation, you put every family member at risk of harm directly and from the irrelevant marriage termination outcomes.
2. Substance Abuse
Qualitative mediation requires hard work and continuous commitment from both spouses. Substance abuse may cause serious obstacles to efficient cooperation throughout the mediation process. If one or both partners suffer from substance abuse problems, they may be seriously distracted and waste their possibility of reaching an agreement with the help of mediation.
| Case | Description |
|---|---|
| Domestic Violence | If there is a history of domestic violence or abuse in the relationship, mediation may not be safe or appropriate. In these cases, it is important for the victim to seek legal representation and protection. |
| Power Imbalance | If there is a significant power imbalance between the spouses, such as one spouse having much greater financial resources or legal knowledge, mediation may not be effective in achieving a fair and balanced agreement. |
| Substance Abuse | If one or both spouses are struggling with substance abuse or addiction, it may be difficult to engage in productive and meaningful mediation sessions. |
| Mental Illness | If one or both spouses are dealing with significant mental health issues, they may not be able to fully participate in mediation or make informed decisions about the divorce agreement. |
| High Conflict | If the relationship is characterized by high levels of conflict, hostility, or mistrust, mediation may not be able to effectively address these issues and may even make them worse. In these cases, it may be more appropriate to pursue traditional litigation. |
| Lack of Willingness | If one or both spouses are not willing to participate in mediation or do not believe it will be effective, mediation may not be a viable option for resolving the divorce. |
3. Mental Health Issues
This is quite an obvious condition when is divorce mediation not recommended. If one of the partners has problems with mental health that prevent them from making sound decisions, they won’t manage to take part in mediation qualitatively. A lack of participation and cooperation means a lack of results. And that is where mediation will bring no good for you but only a waste of resources.
4. Power Imbalances
If you and your partner have different backgrounds and resources, your potential and mediation outcomes may be different as well. For example, if one spouse has better education, relevant experience, or more money to hire a qualified consultant, their decisions and strategy will be smarter. As a result, the mediation results won’t be as equitable as they were expected to be.
5. Lack of Trust
Mediation is not a recommended option when you have trust issues and cannot fully rely on your soon-to-be ex. The process requires openness and readiness to cooperate. If any of you are not capable to commit efficiently, there is hardly a point to choose mediation as the best possible solution for divorce.
6. High Conflict
Overall, mediation is aimed at directing your discussion the right way and optimizing your cooperation. But if the relationships are so tense between you that you cannot have peaceful and proactive discussions in any way, mediation is not a suitable variant. If you are here only because of the lower cost of divorce mediation but not to reach a peaceful and mutually beneficial agreement, things will hardly work out in the end. So that you will lose money on mediation and then have to pay for litigation anyway.
7. Complexity of Issues
Mediation is oriented on simple and straightforward cases where both sides are willing to cooperate. This implies that if you have complex issues to deal with, big assets or debts to divide, and so on, mediation will not help you in reaching an agreement quickly and efficiently. You should look for different options for developing a suitable divorce resolution instead. Or at least, talk to your lawyer first so that you know you will handle your case through meditation anyway.
8. Unwillingness to Compromise
Divorcees often choose this strategy since they know what to expect at divorce mediation. They are ready to open discussion and look forward to finding a comfortable solution for everyone.
Yet, if any of you aim to bluff, ignore the good faith as the core of your cooperation, and are not targeted at a compromise that will satisfy both of you, mediation will not any good for you.
Conclusion
Mediation is a great option to deal with your marriage termination without much turbulence and waste of time and money. It allows you to craft beneficial and comfortable solutions specific to your situation. But it will only work if you qualify for the method. Couples who suffer from domestic violence, substance abuse, or mental health issues, or aim to base their cooperation not on good faith will find no use in mediation for their divorce case.
So, before you choose what to do next with your marriage termination and consider mediation as an option, analyze your case closely and reach for a lawyer’s advice to guarantee that your choice will bring you success and satisfaction after divorce.
